Mother's Day 2012

This is the season of parenting we are in. 

Busy.

Family time looks different than it did when we had toddlers.  Our weekdays are full of practices and games, one sport or another.  One parent going here, and the other parent going there.  Rarely are the five of us together at the same time.  And now we are in the season of Sunday games and Sunday recitals and Sunday tournaments.  Our schedule is packed.

It just is what it is.

Would I have rather been in church this morning?  Yes.  But I would have been torn.  I would have missed half of my heart.  I would have missed my people doing what they love.

So the question is, do we separate our attention?  Or, do we embrace the new season of family time?  How do we find balance in the midst of this season?  I don't know the answer.  I'm still trying to figure this parenting stage out.  I'm not perfect.  I make mistakes, but I'm learning to give myself grace.

I don't know much, but what I do know is that I would have missed seeing Zeb's helmet with my name written on it and his little hand-drawn heart.

I'm so glad I saw that sweet sign of affection {especially from him}.  I needed that.

With my whole heart, I needed that.

It's the little things that matter most during this season of busy.

Happy Mother's Day from an imperfect momma who is taking in the deep breath of grace today. 

The 24 reasons why I love my smart phone.

If I had the nerve, I would re-title this post to say, "The 24 reasons why I am glad I didn't ruin my smartphone by peeing on it."

But I'm not that brave.

I am afraid some sicko would go*gle "smart phone" and "pee" and end up here looking at all my reasons I love my phone. That just gives me the shivers.

I know it's happened a million times before to lots of other great people. Your hands are full so you put your phone in your back pocket. Then you forget about it when you enter the restroom. Normal people might hear the PLOP as their phones hit the water. Not me. No ma'am. I barely even register the {how should I put this} splash. I thought it was just a jiggly toilet seat. Little did I know that MY LIFE was in that toilet!

Everyone with a smart phone knows EXACTLY what I mean by that!

After screaming and being sufficiently freaked out for the occasion, a friend of mine grabbed my {wet} phone and took it all apart and dumped it in a baggie full of silicon beads. It all happened so fast. I will never forget the look on his face when he realized WHY my phone was wet.

ICKY.

A day and many prayers later, my phone came back to life! {Praise Jesus!} I didn't lose one single thing, most of all my pictures.

The reason for this post. The 24 reasons why I love my smart phone, and the stories behind them.

**warning, very long post ahead! 
**literally fought with wordpress and blogger for two days on this post, so the pictures are in very random order.  I just want to be done!!!

Skip and I both graduated from Texas Christian University.  They send baby gifts when alumni announce births.  Wit found this in a drawer!  He is TCU quality, alright.

Alana and I trained to run in a half marathon this December.  {What? What?}  This was before the race started, the after was NOT SO FRESH!  What a journey this was for us.  Lots of emotional highs and lows.  My lowest point in training was fighting with Achilles tendinitis.  Very painful.  Around mile 8 of the race, it gave out.  I couldn't run without excruciating pain.  I convinced Alana to go on without me and we parted through a haze of tears.  I was turning back when a friend from church came alongside me and said I would regret this forever if I didn't finish.  Even if it took hours, I was finishing.  My friend Pam walked a mile with me and finally I decided I wanted to run the rest of the race.  It was only God and me at that point.  He gave me the strength to cross that finish line with my head held high!  I am so proud of what we accomplished!

Happy Valentine's Day! Love decorating for this special day!

I love these women! We met in the early days of parenting at MOPS. What an incredible gift! Alana, Michelle, Shelley and Jen...I love you!

Wit meets the Easter Bunny!  My only kiddo who wasn't terrified!

Sweet Langley had a speaking part in her 2nd grade musical!  Her lines were about how F-U-N music is and how it helps us learn.  {doesn't she look like she is having FUN?}  So proud of my shy girl for having the courage to speak in front of hundreds of people.  Even if she didn't look like she was having F-U-N!

PLAY BALL!!!  Opening day for 2012.  My favorite player is up to bat. 

Zeb's athletic cup, aka, "Mr. Happy."  I will never understand boys.

Easter Sunday 2012.  This is the first year no one had matching new clothes.  I call it growth on my part.  I just don't care anymore!  Or, maybe I do care but I'm too tired.  Anyway, they look lovely!  I am proud of my kids!

This picture makes my heart happy.  Less than a year ago, my brother had a stroke and you would never know it.  He is getting stronger and healthier as the year has gone on.  I am so very proud of all the work he has done for himself.  I love that he takes such an interest in my kids.  He taught Zeb how to grill the most amazing burgers!  We love Uncle Mikey!

Easter Sunday at my Grannie's house.  We had a wonderful time celebrating Easter with a lot of food and outdoor fun!  My cousin, Renae and her son, Ayden came from Kansas.  From left to right, Renae, Grannie, me, my pretty mom, and Langley!  I am blessed by these amazing and strong women!

Skip drooling and dreaming over an 80 inch TV.  I couldn't get him to move from that spot and when I did, he had drool running down his chin.  Thou shalt not covet.

April 18, 2001 at 7:47am this awesome kids was born.  Eleven years has flown by.  Being a first born means that we make mistakes together.  I am trying to figure out how this thing called GRACE works!  But mostly, I love this kid!!!!

Her mission?  Find every climbing tree and climb them.

I take my Wingman along when I volunteer at school.  There is a secret workroom in Langley's school and that is usually where we like to do our work.  It's quiet and small and just the right size for a paper fort built by a three year old!  He makes a new one every week!

SOGGY.  Where have you gone, Soggy?  Wit misses you so much.  I keep thinking you will turn up, but you stay hidden.  Thank goodness I had the presence of mind to order two of these amazing blankies.  I am so afraid we will lose the last one though!

P90X.  It's a miracle I even get up in the morning!  I set my alarm for 4:45 because my sweet neighbor comes over at 5:00 sharp.  We spend an hour working out before the world wakes up.  I have come to love this time so much.  Meanwhile, across town is another friend that wakes up at 5:00 to do the same.  We text each other to make sure we got ourselves out of bed!  It's a great way to hold each other accountible!

What a fun memory this was!  My stepdad is a professional angler {it means he fishes real good for money}.  Anyway, he was in a tournament on our local lake and was in good standing to come in first.  We sent him this text message the final day.  AND...He won!!!  It was so exciting!  He's kind of a big deal in the fishing world and we get the priviledge of calling him, "grandpa."

I can't get enough of this face.  This loud, crazy, yelling face has me head over heels!

There are no words.

First time Wit wrote his name!!  W-I-T!!!  So glad I had my camera to capture this precious memory!!

October 28, 2003 at 1:59pm a beautiful, sweet, kind baby girl was born.  Life has never been the same!  Now she is eight and I just want her to freeze here.  Thankyouverymuch.

One of my favorite things I did last year was to run a 5K with Zeb on Thanksgiving morning.  It was amazing to be with him.  Skip and Zeb have so many more chances to bond through sports, but running is mine and his alone.  We had the best time talking and laughing.  My heart will remember this day forever!!!!  And, wow.  That kid is fast!

After the half marathon and all my ankle struggles, Alana recommended that I have my running assessed by a local running store.  They video you running and can tell everything about you in the thirty second feed.  I have always had Asics and through this process learned that they are one of the worst things for MY running.  They fitted me in a Brooks minamalist shoe.  Not only is it sassy, but it is the miracle that I needed to keep my running up.  Currently, Alana and I are still running twice a week.  We aren't training, but maintaining about 5 miles.  The shoe assessment was well worth the time!  If you run, DO IT!!!

Thank you so much for hanging in there with me!  I have about 300 more photos on my phone that are now safetly uploaded to my computer.

JUST IN CASE...

On eating elephants.

Zeb's 4th grade teacher is a master at motivating her students. She relates to them in such an honest, pure, and humorous way. She has a gift for teaching squirmy (and sometimes smelly) 4th graders. Watching her in action is like being in the presence of greatness.  Truly.

In April, they took the state-mandated achievement tests. For two weeks students labored over the MAP standardized test and it was quite overwhelming. Mrs. P. told her kids to look at the test in terms of eating an elephant.

You don't sit down at your table and gooble up an entire elephant in one sitting. You have to plan it. You have to take it slowly. You have to take the elephant in small sections or you will get completely overwhelmed.

She would say this to them and they would giggle. Eating an elephant is quite the word picture.  But it was something that stuck with these 10-year-olds.  They learned to slow down and take the test one chunk at a time.

One day at a time.

Until it was over.

That is how I feel now after ALL THE STUFF that has happened in my family these past few weeks.  The recovery period for my brother, my father-in-law, and my mom seems like a pretty big elephant sitting there on my kitchen table.  There is a lot of work to do before they are all healthy.  When I look at the BIG PICTURE I get scared and overwhelmed.  Like if I was told to eat a whole elephant in one sitting.  When/IF I remember Mrs. P's advice and start breaking it down,  it seems much more manageable.

One day at a time.

For the most part, everyone is doing really well.  My brother is regaining strength and mobility everyday.  He is learning how to eat better and eliminate stress factors.  His blood pressure is now down in the healthy range that it should have been all these years.  The progress he is making is nothing short of a miracle.  God has given him a second chance at life.  I am so proud of him.  He will beat this!

My father-in-law, Ralph 2, is also gaining strength.  He stubbornly tried to work yesterday and the heat literally wiped him out.  He needs to take some time for rest and recuperation.  I think he (mistakenly) feels like he is invincible.  I do hope that he can be healthy for many many more years.  I would love to see him permanantly retire and go on his dream vacation to Australia. 

My mom is one-handed and will be for the next 6-8 weeks.  But the good news (for now) is that the doctor feels like she doesn't need surgery to heal.  She will go back in a week for more x-rays, but (for now) the doctor is satisfied with her progress.  I know she is frustrated.  It is really hard on her to be "handicapped" in any way.  She is a worker and has a huge responsibility taking care of my brother.  But she is determined to make the best of it. 

It's so easy for me to look at the BIG PICTURE (or the giant elephant) and get completely overwhelmed.  Nothing good comes from me freaking out.  I promise you that. 

So I remember to breathe. 

In and out. 

Make a plan.

Bite off small chunks.

And pretty soon the elephant will be gone.

One day at a time.

**If you clicked here looking for an elephant recipe, I am sorry.  No elephants are actually being eaten.  Not by me and not by any 4th graders that I know.  I heart metaphors.

Finding myself at a loss for words.

I have been meaning to post for the last two weeks but haven't known where to begin.  Two weeks ago our lives changed in ways we never expected.  A season of hardship ushered in blowing drought-like winds over our tired bodies.

Just two short weeks ago we were...

• celebrating the end of diapers FOREVER
• making our summer bucket list
• going on play dates
• having sleepovers
• celebrating my step-dad's tournament victory on our hometown lake
• making 4th of July potluck plans
• planning a trip to St. Louis with some of our best friends

Life changes in the blink of an eye.

Two weeks ago my brother had a stroke and Skip's dad had a heart attack.  Both within two days of each other.  Both in two different hospitals in our area.  Both serious.

As if that wasn't enough.  My family also had 3 rounds of stomach flu and 1 throat virus with high fevers to manage.  Add in other heavy and very sad life issues surrounding us.  Our small corner of the world was hit hard.

We adapted.

Our schedules, our kids, our plans, our calendar, our desires all adapted to fit the needs of this crisis.  Skip and I passed each other coming and going from one hospital to another.  Our kids went from friend to friend to friend.  I struggle with asking for help.  Meaning that it must be a weakness of some sort to admit that you are struggling and need your friends.  It's not.  My friends busted down the wall I was building and love poured through the cracks.  Every text, every call, every meal, every offer for kids was perfectly timed in my weakest moments. 

God knew what I needed and when.  And He made my friends even more amazing.

Both men are home from their respective hospitals and are slowly getting nursed back to health.  Both will take some time before they are back to normal.  Life slowly is starting to fall back into place.  Our vacation plans to St. Louis were cancelled.  But we adapted, once again and had a staycation (post coming) with our friends.  Smiles have started to replace worry lines.

Then yesterday.

My mom, who is nursing my brother back to health, fell and broke her wrist in two places.  Two very bad breaks.  She finds out tomorrow whether those breaks will require surgery to heal.  (Oh, please Lord, no)

My heart can't take any more hurt.

I am finding myself at a loss for words.

My God understands.

He can read between the silent broken pieces of my heart.

My job.  Keep laying down my fears, my worries, my anger, my doubts, my weariness, my will.

At His feet.

At the cross.

Wait for joy.

And rest.

The four RZ's.

It seems like yesterday that I promised to tell you the story of how our antique store got it's name.  To my surprise, a week has gone by.  Time flies when the kids are home for summer break.  But you are in luck today.  All three darlings have stopped fighting (for the moment) and are playing quietly in separate corners of the house.  So here goes. 

The story behind the name RZ's.

The day had finally arrived.  The day that we gave birth to our first son.

Skip and I woke up at about 4 am on April 18, 2001.  We drove to the hospital and anxiously awaited the next few hours while they prepped me for birth.  I couldn't believe we were about to see our baby boy. 

Our first child.

Finally, the moment arrived.  Our son was born and placed lovingly into my arms.  Tears of joy from Skip and I.  We were parents! 

The nurse gazed upon this new family.  She asked us what name we were giving our new baby boy.

We looked adoringly into our baby's eyes and said, "We shall name him Ralph."


UM, WHAT?!

OK.  OK.  It wasn't quite like that.  But let me explain why we did name our sweet baby boy, Ralph. 

The first Ralph and his sweet bride, Earlene.  Aren't they cute?

Skip's grandpa on his dad's side was named Ralph Zebedee Miller.  By all accounts, he was a gentle, loving man.  His family adored him.  I missed meeting him by just a few months.  Skip and I started dated after he had passed away.  His absence left a huge hole in their family.  All the children and grandchildren revered him.  I am so sad that I never met the man that filled their hearts with so much joy. 

Skip's favorite memory of his grandpa was that he always drove with a lead foot.  When he pulled out of a parking lot, white dust and rock heavily sprayed the area. 

Apparently, this was his signature move!

Anyway, he named his first son Ralph Zebedee Miller, Jr.  That man is Skip's dad.  Probably the smartest and most generous man I have ever met.  He has a tender heart where his family is concerned.  He is a work horse that could have retired many years ago from the family businesses, but is still going strong in his early 80's.  He has a deep passion for his children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren.  If he isn't working, he is at some child's activity or sporting event.  He loves to see all his kids excel.

Ralph 2 surrounded by all his people.

Ralph, Jr. also loves to travel and has a heart for adventure.  He has planned 16 "Mystery Trips" for us over the years.  It is always a blast trying to figure out where he is taking this big crazy family after Christmas. We have been to some amazing places!  When he sees all the family together he always squeezes his wife's hand and says, "All I wanted was a movie."  Lovingly referring to their first date.  He is a special man.

Anyway, he had a son that he named Ralph Zebedee Miller, III.  Or, affectionately known as "Skip".  My husband.  And I am crazy about him. My life wouldn't be complete without my best friend.  He is such a good man, great father and a very hard worker.  He carries this family on his back. 

Every. Single. Day.

Anyway, Skip (Ralph 3) had a son that he named Ralph Zebedee Miller IV.  Or, as we call him, "Zeb".  Our first born son.

Ralph 2, Ralph 3 and the newest Ralphie.

Ralph 2,3 and 4 go walking.

This precious name has been in the family for over 100 years.  I hope and pray that it will continue with Zeb and so on down the line.  It is so special to Skip's family.

This picture is priceless.  I can only imagine what Ralph 4 was telling his papa.

Another thing that is special is the family business.  It started back in 1975 when Skip's parents moved to B-Town from North Carolina.  Back in the day, the family sold fabric and assorted merchandise to the B-Town tourists.  In 1988, they started the $1 Shops.  The first store of its kind.  Now you can buy quality $1 merchandise just about anywhere. 

Throughout the most recent years, the company has faced many hardships and cut backs.  Just like everything else in America it has weathered the economic storms.  The face of the company looks different this year, but the family is still thriving and working hard to bring it all back to the glory days.

Ralph, Jr is still the head of the company and many many family members are the arms, legs, sweat and muscle.  So when it came time to name the newest business (the flea market), Skip and his sisters went with the initials "RZ" to symbolize how important the Ralph legacy has been over the years.

And that, my friends, is the story of the four Ralphs. 

Funny side note.  I was laying in bed with Zeb (Ralph 4) the other night talking about this very thing.  I asked him if he was going to continue the name when he has a son. 

He said, "Yes, but I don't think Ralph will ever be a cool name."

He started brainstorming "cool" nicknames for the future Ralph 5.

He came up with "ALF".

Because naming a baby after a furry alien in an 80's sitcom is totally cool.

Easter 2011

Every year I line the kids up on the front porch for the obligatory Easter picture.

This year was no different.

They don't love it, but they indulge me.

Someday they will appreciate this.

At least that's what I chose to believe.

I'm takin' this with me if we move.

Well, I am doing what I said I would yesterday.  I have chained myself to the house and I am taking it back. It is going so SLLLOOOOWWWLLLLYYY. I have been in the laundry room most of the day and I wanted to show you my very favorite thing in this house.

I have a friend who is a muralist. When I was pregnant with Langley, I hired her to paint this growth chart in the laundry room.  This ain't your ordinary growth chart. It's a work of art and my absolute favorite thing.

Forgive the terrible pictures.  There seems to be a horrible glare from the dryer and I didn't have much room to work with.  All around the room were huge piles of laundry and junk.  I refuse to show you that. 

Which is funny because I have pretty much bared my soul here on this blog.  But I feel a need to keep the mess in my laundry room a deep dark secret.

Mess in my life open for sharing?  Yes.

Disorganized chaos in the laundry room?  No.

I have to draw the line somewhere, people.

Anyway, back to the growth chart.  Every birthday, and happy-half birthday, my kids get measured.  They look forward to it as much as I do on their special days.  I treasure the way their not-so-tiny bodies (*sigh*) stand against the wall stick straight and how they delight in how much they have grown in six months.

The verse above the growth chart says...

"The child continued to grow and become strong increasing in wisdom; and the grace of God was upon Him."  Luke 2:40

Rest assured, IF we ever move this wall is coming with me.

 
And if it can't, then we won't ever be able to move.

So there you have it. 

He's kind of a big deal.

If you read my story last week, you know that my dad passed away when I was in college after a long battle with cancer. It was a hard loss for our family and especially my mom. My brother and I had already moved onto our college campuses far away from home. My mom was alone.

She spent many years alone.

One night a friend asked her to a dinner party. I'm not sure if this party was an attempt to set her up on a date, but she ended up meeting a special man.  They dated for about a year before they got married.  I'm not gonna lie, this was a very hard thing for me to accept.  In fact, I was pretty much a brat to my mom during this time. 

But then it dawned on me that my mom was happy.  Really happy.  Happier than I had seen her in a long time.  She started caring about life again.  She was blossoming.  Slowly, I started to accept this new reality for her and for our family.

My step-dad is a really great guy.  I have enjoyed getting to know him and watching him with my kids has been such a sweet reward.  My kids were born after my mom remarried so he has been their "PA" since day one.  My mom has told me that my kids are the best thing that ever happened to him.  He loves them so much. 

That's a big deal to me. 

Well, he lives in a world that I'm still getting used to.  He is a professional angler (fancy words for he fishes for money).  He's kind of a big deal in the fishing world.  If you follow the sport, or have a TV you have probably seen him on a commercial or a fishing show.

 

The people in his world say funny things like...

Scrounger Shads
Flippin' Booza Bug
Spinner bait
Buzz bait
Rattling Jig
Finess Jig
Skirt Buzzer
Storm Wiggle Wart
Jerk bait
Hollow Belly swim bait

It's a very strange world.

One of my greatest joys is watching Stacey teach my kids about his world.  He wants to share his passion for hunting and fishing with my kids.  That's a great thing.  It's something that Skip can't teach them and we are grateful for his knowledge.  There is no one I would rather have teach my kids about the outdoor life than Stacey. 

He's the best of the best.

His world is becoming an important part of theirs.

He's kind of a big deal to my little people.